So where to start? I was always told that the beginning was the best place, but I don’t think you want to hear about my beginning. A drunken night in Burton-on-Trent on the bonnet of a 1956 Renault Dauphine is not a particularly glamorous way to be conceived but to be fair to her she was at the time considered to give one of the most comfortable rides in the North of England. My mother that is. The Renault on the other hand wasn’t held in quite the same regard by the men of Northern England. The Dauphine was probably the most ineffective piece of French engineering since the Maginot Line, but it provided a solid enough platform for my mother on many occasions so it will always hold a special place in my heart.

But anyway, I digress, I am here to talk about Hector and not drunken fumblings on the bonnet of sub-standard European motors, although there are many parallels between this and the Hector : Badge of Carnage game for the iPhone, iPod Touch and iPad.

I thought I would start with the Hector : Badge of Carnage YouTube Trailer. It sums up what the Hector iApp is all about much better than me banging on about my promiscuous relatives does.

Pretty sweet, huh? 18, 932 people can’t be wrong can they? Well actually they probably could give the current state of the political landscape, but that is a conversation for another blog and for someone who gives a crap about politics. But hopefully this video has whet your appetite and you are now just just wondering where to go to get your copy of Hector : Bagde of Carnage. Click here to go directly to iTunes and download the game now or go to www.thehectorfiles.tv to find out more about Hector.

Now off you go. And if this post has done nothing else but discourage you from ever purchasing a Renault Dauphine or visiting Burton-on-Trent then my work here is done.

Unless you have been living in a cave for the last few weeks you will know that the Hector : Badge of Carnage iApp has hit the iTunes App Store with the sort of force that is usually only seen at chucking out time at the Broken Arms in Clappers Wreake. Well, in case you were wondering why the blog has been emptier than a Scottish pay toilet for the last few weeks, I have in fact been living in a cave so I am only now catching up with the news on how well my old mate Hector has been doing. It seems that the game has been making more waves than Hector used to make in the bath on Mutton Vindaloo Wednesdays.

So I plan to explore the web over the next few weeks and for the benefit of those other poor souls who were also recently living in a cave I will be posting some of the online blurb about the game and allowing even the most reclusive of people to find out about the first installment of the Hector Badge of Carnage trilogy of games.

If you want to find out more about Hector – Fat Arse of the Law – and the Badge of Carnage game then go to www.thehectorfiles.tv and see what all of the fuss is about. Or you can click here to go directly to iTunes and buy the beast right now. And if you want to find out why I was living in a cave for the last few months, then you will have to mind your own damn business. That is a matter between me and the Leopard Man of Skye